Twisted Affections
by Dark Fairy of Doom
Summary: Descriptions of the complex relationship between Gauron and Sousuke. A collection of drabbles and oneshots.
1. Chapter 1

AN: Well, I've been really obsessed with Full Metal Panic lately. That prompted me to claim this pairing at 1sentence on livejournal and this is the end result! Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own Full Metal Panic or its characters. I simply borrowed them for fanfiction. I make no money from my endeavors.  


Warnings: slash, implied sex  


* * *

  
1) Comfort: He welcomed Kaname's angry explosions, as they consumed his attention; her fury didn't leave him the time to ponder on the marks Gauron had left on his sanity.

2) Kiss: Sousuke was left reeling after their first kiss, his wrists aching from confinement and his lips tingling with heat as throaty laughter burrowed into his mind.

3) Soft: Gauron's hands are calloused with years of battle; his experience is present in the harsh way he treats his Kashim's confession; the boy should have known better than to expect kindness.

4) Pain: Sharp white exploded behind his eyes at the sound of crushed steel, Melissa's AS destroyed by cruel hands; Gauron's taunting inspired a blaze so hot that the sparking anger was painful.

5) Potatoes: A late night rendezvous makes him miss an engagement with Chidori; as he's forced to peel potatoes, he resolves to reevaluate the people in his life.

6) Rain: The sudden onslaught of the storm suits his somber mood, echoing the dark glaze in his stare; a dull wince spreads over his tense features as the drops sting his face, whispers of _I love you, Kashim_ searing in the wind.

7) Chocolate: Sousuke's eyes nervously follow the path of nimble fingers, silvery foil paring in a slow crawl; popping a piece of chocolate in his mouth, Gauron's suggestive smirk earns a flushed mercenary.

8) Happiness: He is content here, Kaname at his side as they fish, and he carefully keeps the previous day far away from his thoughts; he won't allow himself to brood on the enigmatic parting gesture.

9) Telephone: Gauron's voice is static, calmly pursuing the awkward topic; with shaking whitened fingers the phone is slammed back onto its cradle, innocently cutting off the terrorist's words.

10) Ears: Warm breaths puff over the rim of his ear, each exhale of the man behind him slightly blowing strands of his hair; after a weird chuckle, the man purposely moves forward, his lips brushing where his breath had hovered; he jerks away and ignores the twisting in the depths of his stomach.

11) Name: The drug-induced, blurred haze gradually drifted away, coherency soon following; he endures the cheerful exclamation of "Sousuke!" though a distant part of him had expected- _hoped for- _the drawl of "Kashim".

12) Sensual: Teeth dragged across the base of his neck, fingertips dug possessively into the small of his back; shivering, he unconsciously bared his neck, wanting it to not be happening, wanting it to be someone else, _not wanting it to stop_.

13) Death: He defines their relationship through levels of fatality; so far, he reigns master over Kashim; they'll only be equal when facing each other for the final time, death inevitably claiming them both.

14) Sex: Kurz laughed and said it was great; Melissa blinked when he brought it up, then snickered and slapped him across the back, "Way to go Sousuke!"; Chidori turned various shades of red before smacking him on the head with her paper fan; Gauron just smirked and proceeded to show him just what it was all about.

15) Touch: Depending on the situation, his touch can be many things- murderous, painful, gentle- and the people involved also affect his behavior; Kashim is the only person- still living- that has felt almost all the different aspects of his touch.

16) Weakness: Kaname's resting in her room, exhausted after the ordeal; he's still awake, the sparse number of still working staff congratulating him on his earlier profanity; he pays them little mind, instead mindlessly walking to the site of the battle- he can still fell the clash of emotions, dulled by the last few hours, and he does his best not to acknowledge the raw feeling burning in his throat.

17) Tears: The alcohol saps away his inhibitions, drawing out the vulnerable ball of emotions rotting in the back of his mind; Kurz is there to stem the flow of sobs, telling himself that Sousuke wasn't murmuring about how "that bastard was lying, he didn't mean it"; he also told himself that his friend didn't want Gauron to have meant it.

18) Speed: Thinking about it always made him chuckle; he wondered if Kashim considered how fast things had gone; he had a felling the boy just denied it all.

19) Wind: Sand was everywhere, even ripped about by the slightest breeze; Grey watched Sousuke where he was seated away from them, stiff profile unaffected by the stirred sediment; she continued to observe him as he told them about the massacre that had occurred years before and she got the notion that the hollowness in his voice came from more than just the loss.

20) Freedom: Kaname's glare darkened at the uncharacteristic shadows on Sousuke's face, her fingers curling into anxious fists; even dead, that damn Gauron still messed with their lives; it pissed her off that Sousuke couldn't seem to free himself from the terrorist's influence.

21) Life: Chidori's control of the submarine saved all of their lives; repeatedly slamming metal limbs into the flight deck, he could only think about Gauron's end, wondering why the man had said the things he'd said and why Gauron had wanted to end their lives together.

22) Jealousy: Stalking Chidori Kaname was boring on a good day and tedious on a bad one; the description altered to agitating when he spied her chatting away with a young sergeant on a metal bench; he refused to believe that he could be jealous of a teenage girl or possessive over what was supposed to have been a fling.

23) Hands: He jumped at the sudden pressure on his hand, too startled to protest as warm fingers twined with his own; his wide eyes were met with a nonchalant, "Something the matter, Kashim?" and a cheeky grin.

24) Taste: If he had to, he would say that Gauron tasted like smoke and chocolate; Gauron had, for the sole sake of personal amusement, considered telling Kashim he tasted of a bizarre blend of gunpowder and vanilla.

25) Devotion: He knows that someone like Gauron has no loyalties; that doesn't stop the sick, hurt feeling he gets when the man seizes control of the De Danaan and takes the Captain and Kaname hostage.

26) Forever: Gauron's last words- _I love you, Kashim_- haunt him; on the nights he can't force himself to sleep, he wondered if he'd ever be able to forget them.

27) Blood: He doesn't remember most of his dreams, but the ones he can are absolutely colorless; the most recent was also the most disturbing- everything was varying shades of grey, the people he knew waking motionless, Melissa staring at him eerily, silvery eyes wide; he turned around and Gauron was there, splashed with brilliant crimson; bleeding violently, the man stalked forward, grinning widely, "I love you"; after that, he's glad he doesn't remember most of his dreams.

28) Sickness: Chidori's frigid scowl softened at the harsh cough, a sigh soon following as she forced the ill Sousuke to leave school; reluctantly lying down, Sousuke feverishly wondered if she would have been as kind if she had known Gauron had had the same thing a few days prior.

29) Melody: The perky, mellow hum emitting from Gauron's mouth both horrified and bemused him; at his odd expression, the terrorist simply shrugged, "American song".

30) Star: He reached his first orgasm with Gauron's slick tongue against his own and electric blue and silver stars flaring behind his eyes.

31) Home: There are only two people alive who knew him as a child; though he knows he shouldn't, he can't help going to Gauron, intent on recapturing something he'd lost long ago.

32) Confusion: Kaname's bewildered eyes drifted from Kurz's panicked face to Melissa, who was equally exasperated, to Sousuke's pale and withdrawn expression; she remembered seeing Gauron dragged to a cell and wondered why things just wouldn't fit together.

33) Fear: The anxiety buzzed around the edges of his consciousness, sending tremors through the tendons of his fingers; rough hands skimming over his flushed skin, his fear of discovery is forgotten until, getting dressed, it grows stronger with a sense of shame.

34) Lightning/Thunder: Gauron's parting words cast his vision into a whitewash, draining away all color in a burning flash; though the submarine was rather subdued after everything was finished, the cackling voice still seemed deafening.

35) Bonds: "Do you love him?"- He starts at the abrupt question, turning to stare at Kurz's intent expression- "If not, what the hell is keeping you stuck on him!?"; the unbroken silence shows that he's just as clueless as Kurz.

36) Market: The canned crab meat nearly fell from suddenly limp fingers, only saved by worn reflexes; dark eyes narrowed uneasily, he tried to spot the secretive figure again; when he found nothing, he convinced himself that world class assassins wouldn't be skulking around Japanese supermarkets.

37) Technology: The knowledge extracted from the Whispered has the possibility of being infinite; the Armed Slaves equipped with the LAMBDA driver show both the success and limits of such advanced mechanics- the technology still heavily relies on the minds of the pilots; nothing can overcome mental instability and emotional attachments.

38) Gift: Kaname's presence is something he's not quite sure how to deal with; when being near to her makes him feel calm, he's grateful that she was so close when things had fallen apart.

39) Smile: Tessa had made it a habit to watch Sagara when the sergeant was sure no one was watching him; though her stealth left much to be desired, she did manage to see things she was positive he was trying to hide, such as his confusion around Chidori, or the closeness of his unit; still, she can't hide her disappointment when she spies him smiling softly, staring blankly out one of the submarine's windows; the soft expression held no connection to anyone she'd ever observed him with, so she could only speculate and she reached her conclusion after the last battle with Gauron.

40) Innocence: He's a seasoned combatant, but he still doesn't believe in inherent evil; Gauron quietly laughs to himself at the boy's naiveté, plotting darkly to show Kashim just how vile people can be.

41) Completion: Just after Kashim stomped away, lips still an angry red from the violent kiss, the man hiding in an alcove finally stepped forward; the man grinned widely, white teeth flashing, "You two deserve each other"; later, the man's body is found with four of his pearly white teeth missing.

42) Clouds: The clouds were blotches of white in bright blue, drifting lazily in random swirls; the blood continues to spill from his wounds as he lies next to the wreckage of the AS, his pain-dulled eyes lazily following the pattern of white fluff; the surrealism lasts even as a familiar face looms closer, colors spiraling as his body is lifted from the dirt.

43) Sky: The twisted metal looms against the drab landscape, glinting in the fierce afternoon sun; he finds Kashim amongst the debris, gazing vacantly at the gaping blue sky; that same sky darkens to violets and oranges as he drops the fool at the nearest town, smoking in the lobby of a nearby hotel as the bewildered hospital staff rush into action.

44) Heaven: Once, out of his mind with a heavy dosage of pain killers and antibiotics, his mind whirled into an imaginary world; there, he was carefree, never having witnessed wars or real combat; Kurz and Melissa are just as innocent and Kaname is there to bring extra cheer; the thing that most startles him when he regains rationality is that Gauron had been there as well, smiling brightly as he held him.

45) Hell: He woke up groggy, his senses bogged down with drowsiness; the uncharacteristic lethargy instantly invokes caution, his skin tingling with hypersensitivity as he tries to adjust; his composure vanishes at the warmth sinking into his back, jumbled shards of memory returning; he clenches his eyes closed as the knowledge flashes across his conscious- last night had actually happened.

46) Sun: The sun reflecting off the metal of the AS momentarily blinded him, his features twisting into a pained grimace; after the colors returned, he was greeted with the sight of the terrorist sitting on the transport vehicle, smirking idly to himself; in an odd mood, he almost expects the man's figure to waver, falling away into the shimmers cast by the desert sand.

47) Moon: The moon is high in the night sky when he makes his way back to the team's apartment, the crescent following his movements with critical attention; the silvery light exposes his lonely, apprehensive expression as he makes his way inside, trembling in both fear and the remembrance of lingering touches.

48) Waves: He stood on the beach, intense gaze focused on the waves the sea crashed against the sandy shore; he was here despite constant reassurances, chilled by the idea that he could spot a corpse at the ocean's mercy.

49) Hair: When Kashim is lulled into sleep after thorough activity, he can't stop his fingers from gliding through the strands of his dark brown hair; casually dismissing the caring gesture, he twines his fingers deeper into the texture and settles down into slumber.

50) Supernova: Their relationship was based on tumultuous foundations, constantly battered by morals and desire; Gauron's betrayal rends apart their bonds, exploding their shared history into a twist of tainted exchange and regretted confessions.


	2. Oneshot: Unwary Eyes

**AN: **Wow, I really haven't updated anything in a while. I hope this one shot is enjoyable!

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Full Metal Panic!. I make no profit from this fanfiction.

**Summary: **They should have known better. Gauron would never take likely to being spied upon.

**Warnings: **OOC-ness, OC, death, violence, slash

**Extension of: **Completion: Just after Kashim stomped away, lips still an angry red from the violent kiss, the man hiding in an alcove finally stepped forward; the man grinned widely, white teeth flashing, "You two deserve each other"; later, the man's body is found with four of his pearly white teeth missing.

* * *

He shifted slightly, his body protesting at having been kept still so long. He mostly ignored the prickly sensations blooming along his arms and legs, giving his fingers a few stretches as a small surrender to the need for comfort. His eyes were unusually sharp, a light brown that was oddly forceful. They didn't suit his mild, nearly cheerful face. His whole demeanor was at contrast with that face. He was too stiff, too uncompromising. Not to mention that he was hiding in the shady alcove beneath a highway overpass.

He was just about to give his superiors a highly colorful report when the door to a hotel room across the street opened. He immediately switched back into mission mode, his mind falling into a cautious setting. The man across the road was casually standing just outside the door to his room, a lit cigarette creating a dim red halo in the descending dark. He tensed as the man moved back to lean against a cheaply made wall, his stance still radiating calm relaxation. It served to put him on edge. He knew little of the man, but he knew enough to recognize that the seemingly pensive posture was far from harmless. The man was waiting for something.

That something emerged from the thickening twilight twenty minutes later. The flat light brown eyes revealed no evident surprise as the younger man stalked through the approaching night, his footsteps leaving behind a faded echo. The boy walked towards the still lounging man, the cigarette vanishing into drifting ashes. He watched as the boy stormed closer, stiff shoulders set with an apparently old weariness. The man smirked in cold amusement, flicking the dull remnants of his smoke to the murky ground. Both he and the man could see as a trigger inside the boy was pulled. Things happened quite quickly after that.

The boy opened his mouth and said something that was probably angry. He was too far away to really hear anything clearly. It didn't help that the alcove had very poor acoustics. The man appeared to laugh, shrugging in evasive response. The boy clearly began to seethe, one of his hands curling into a possible fist. The man laughed again, making an exaggerated motion that was obviously meant to inflame his companion. It worked well and rather swiftly.

Later, he wouldn't be sure of who made the first move. The boy growled another bitter response, his fury lost as it traveled the distance across the dim asphalt. The man actually seemed provoked by whatever the boy had said, something in his expression shifting. It wasn't anything obvious but it was there. And it was certainly something very interesting. But he didn't have time to ponder it. There was a sudden, flurried explosion of movement, the two figures across the street abruptly mashed together. He instantly tensed, taking a reckless step forward. The man whispered something close to the boy's face, strong fingers tightly gripping the boy's wrist. There were no more words.

He stared in concealed bemusement. The objects of his observation were suddenly kissing, the man's hand still clamped around the boy's wrist. And even from this distance, it was one of the most violent things he had ever seen. There was no tenderness, no affection, in how they came together, aggression present in every subtle movement. The boy's body was held taut, even as his eyes closed in reluctant (and familiar) bliss. The man kept his own eyes open, a cruel glaze glinting in the dim light. His strong fingers caressed the wrist he held captive, intently sweeping across the flesh in possessive amusement. The boy seemed to shiver at the action, some of the tension seeping from his shoulders. The man's eyes flickered strangely, then he abruptly pulled away from the boy.

His eyes narrowed at the man's motions, his gaze briefly skittering to the boy. The boy was still in an afterglow of pleasure, though his body quickly appeared to reorient himself. The boy blinked away the last of the haze and cautiously glanced at the man. The man was smirking, detached and disinterested. The boy grumbled something that made the man laugh. Tensed once more, the boy stalked back off into the night. The man simply watched him go, expression guarded and unreadable.

He waited patiently for the boy to move out of sight. He waited even longer for his confusion to lessen. From what he had seen, he could only come to a limited conclusion. Obviously, there was some kind of _relationship _between the man and boy. The exact nature of that relationship was open to interpretation. But he was sure that he could use it to his advantage.

* * *

Gauron chuckled quietly as Kashim stormed off into the night. His gaze flashed over his surroundings for a sliver of a moment before he reached for another cigarette. A muffled flare of flame and soon smoke lazily drifted into the beams cast by the nearby streetlight. That smoke was waved away as a man walked confidently towards him, his mild features easily forgotten.

Light brown clashed with non-descript grey. Gauron calmly continued to smoke, his expression held with easy rigidity. The man, at first glance, appeared just as callous. But his body was tense, fear coloring the restless stirring of his fingers. He came to a halt a few yards from Gauron, taking care to maintain a safe distance. He was close enough to seem bold but far away enough to be able to make a quick retreat. At least, he would be with a normal man.

He maintained his steady stare with Gauron, refusing to back down, even as his nerves threatened to snap. He hadn't thought that being this close to the terrorist would make him so shaky. Gauron's reputation definitely preceded him and it did nothing to appease his apprehension. In fact, it only increased his anxiety. His superior's orders were insanity. He could see that now. But his only choice was to obey.

He smiled widely, hoping to hide his unease. Gauron eyed his bright white teeth with hollow bemusement. He quirked a mocking brow as the man kept the tense smile, his light brown eyes seeming to swallow what little light there was. His amusement only grew when the smile was finally dropped to be replaced by an uncomfortable frown. It suited the man's cowardly nature.

He took a deep breath, his lips pressed together in a firm, flat line. He took a long, lingering look at Gauron and once again cursed his superiors. The only comfort he could find for himself was the recollection of what he had witnessed between the terrorist and the boy. It could serve as leverage. Keeping that in mind, he subtly (purposely) glanced in the direction the boy had stomped off in. His sharp eyes saw the way Gauron's eyes lazily (_slyly, his instincts whispered) _traced the same path. Steeling his convictions, he said, "You and the boy, you two compliment each other."

Gauron's eyes darkened slightly. The man chanced a reassured smirk. He took a foolish step closer to the terrorist, keeping his tone conspiratorial, arrogant. "You seem to enjoy his company. I'm sure he is quite the…_distraction. _But he suits you." He gave a biting laugh, while something in his mind wailed in hysterical fear. "You two deserve each other."

Gauron took a deep drag on his cigarette, his eyes once again an empty expanse of grey. He held the smoke in a moment, seeming to savor the bitter flavor, before releasing it a long, sustained exhale. The free smoke wavered eerily in the streetlight, the beams of light casting it in a faded hue of silver. Gauron followed after the trail of his smoke, tossing his used cigarette to the ground, grinding it carelessly beneath his heel. As he entered the halo beneath the streetlight, he was also cast in an inverted plane of color, his dark colors turning to the calmer shades of the spectrum, his eyes becoming a fury of burning silver. Overall, he suddenly was a very intimidating presence. The earlier relaxed demeanor was entirely gone. He now looked like the predator he truly was.

The man swallowed thickly, his throat suddenly very dry. He backed away from the image Gauron was projecting, his heart beating fitfully beside his lungs. He felt like a wolf would in the territory of a tiger. Both are powerful hunters, but the tiger knows the terrain. The tiger is the one who is an expert in stealth. Not to mention the experience the tiger holds over the stubbornly reckless wolf. The wolf, clearly, is destined for defeat. And the man knew his fate was the same.

As though sensing the man's abrupt turn of thought, Gauron smiled thinly, his silver eyes flaming with sadistic contentment. "What," he began, his voice a low, regal rumble, "you saw is something that very few people in the world even suspect of existing. And that is far too many for my tastes." He stopped for a second, standing eerily still beneath the streetlight. "I don't like you anymore than those people. And the less that know about it, the better." His smile shifted into a smirk and he moved too swiftly for the man's eyes to follow.

The man tensed for the approaching danger, but was still shocked at the stunning pain that bloomed along his jaw. He stumbled under the blow but did not fall. He blinked back the brilliantly throbbing pain, his keen eyes flickering in desperate caution. His breath escaped him in a cut off gasp when Gauron flashed to his left side, his weapon a blur as he struck him again in the face. That time, he fell. Hissing through stinging teeth, he spit the coppery feel from his mouth. He flinched as something grated against his lips. He reluctantly tugged it free, wincing further when he saw what it was: four of his teeth.

Gauron sneered down at the cowering man, idly wiping the butt of his gun against the bottom of a sleeve. His lip curled back as the moist residue of blood brushed against his skin. He swiped the gun against his sleeve once more before taking aim. He made a soft whistling noise, waiting for the man to turn back to face him.

He licked weakly at where his teeth had been evicted from, the faint tang of blood blazing against his probing tongue. He gave a nearly silent whimper, cursing himself in shame. He should have known better than to mock Gauron. Just as his superiors should have known that spying on the terrorist would only lead to monumental trouble.

He had collected himself enough to attempt to rise to his feet when the whistle whisked into his ears. He instantly tensed, his nerves clamoring for surrender to the inevitable. He eventually turned to face Gauron, his mild, forgettable features molded into defeated terror. As soon as his gaze locked with Gauron's, the terrorist smiled in satisfaction. And in those grey eyes, he saw his death.

* * *

_Gauron lounged against the weak wall of the hotel, his cigarette acting like a beacon in the looming dark. He calmly inhaled the smoke, his grey eyes flickering to the shadows across the street. He could feel eyes watching him. He hoped they enjoyed the show. He was certainly going to enjoy himself._

_His monotony of patient waiting was broken by the ricochet of echoing footsteps. His eyes were laughing as Kashim descended upon him; the boy's dark eyes a blaze of indignant recognition. He shifted against the wall, callously tossing the remnants of his cigarette to the ground. The gesture, rife with indifferent dismissal, ignited the teen's sleeping fury, beginning a play of familiar and often denied emotions._

_Kashim glared heatedly at him, rage and masked hurt darkening his eyes. "What are you doing here?" He was almost impressed by the level of hostility in the voice. He hadn't suspected that his presence would stir up so much resentment. He only laughed in response to the question, his grey eyes brimming with teasing amusement. He could practically hear Kashim gritting his teeth._

_Kashim's body was restless with tension, his fingers unconsciously curling into angry fists. It made him laugh again, his shoulders lifting in a dismissive shrug. He felt the boy's logic fall to his passions and moved swiftly, grabbing onto the wrist of the fist that would have swung at him. He ushered forth more force and pulled Kashim closer, a bare centimeter separating his face from the Mithril agent's._

_"Stop," Kashim's voice was twisted with bitter indecision, old anger, "doing this to me. Stop making me do these foolish things." He snorted at the boy's resentment. He hadn't forced Kashim to do anything. The boy wanted this as much as he did. And he would remind him of that._

_He knew his expression displayed some of his intention when he caught sight of trepidation (and anticipation?) in the dark eyes facing him. His let his breath fan across the teen's face before he closed the distance between them, his mouth sealing over the familiar warmth of Kashim's lips._

_He dug his fingers into Kashim's captive flesh, pulling the boy even closer. He felt the shock still traveling through the teen and applied more pressure. Kashim made a muffled noise, almost like a whine, before seeming to relent. He even felt the boy pressing back. It wasn't long before Kashim was lost in sensation, his eyes hesitantly falling closed. He grinned triumphantly into the kiss, his fingers lightly caressing Kashim's wrist. The teen shivered, leaning even closer to him. He nearly laughed, putting even more force into the movement of his mouth. Kashim sighed and finally relaxed. And that was what he had been waiting for._

_Grey was mocking as he pulled back, licking his lips in contentment. Those lips soon curled up into a detached smirk, the keen gaze watching as the dazed Kashim returned to his senses. As always, the boy was quick. It only took a few milliseconds for him to recollect himself, dark eyes guarded and still only a little hazy. He had to bite back a chuckle when Kashim caught sight of his expression. Those dark eyes turned inward with self-reproach. "Damn you." He couldn't hold his humor back at that; he simply had to laugh. And by the way Kashim stalked away, his lack of restraint wasn't appreciated._

* * *

Gauron sighed at the sight of the man's corpse. His four missing pearly white teeth glinted in the beam of the streetlight. Blood dripped down his chin and from the gunshot wound in his neck. Some of it had seeped into the soles of his shoes. Once again wiping his gun clean, his prodded at the body with one of his ruined shoes. The man didn't move. Gauron smirked in accomplishment. Now there was only the matter of disposing of the garbage. He hoped that the fishermen weren't too startled by what they would find in the water.


End file.
